The Benefits of Practicing Gratitude (Plus a Gratitude Game!)

Two ways we practiced gratitude in our classroom this year were by playing the gratitude game and by journaling what we are thankful for.

Gratitude Game

The gratitude game is very simple and it started out as a personal goal that then turned into a family goal that reached into a classroom game. Seeing the impact it had on my own life and then seeing how it affected my kids inspired me to make it part of the daily routine at The Learning Academy.

To play, all you have to do is be aware of things you are grateful for. I know super easy, right? Sounds like it, but how often are you as an adult taking moments out of your day to acknowledge what you are grateful for? I wasn’t doing it often enough. Being present in your day and stopping to acknowledge your blessings is a grounding, life-affirming action that takes almost no time, but will benefit you both psychologically and physiologically immensely. (see links at the end of this post.) The same is true for our kiddos…but we need to show them how.

Incorporating Gratitude into Everyday Life

I decided to set my goal at five things every day and then write them down in a journal. I’ve had a gratitude journal for quite some time; however, I wasn’t taking time out in my day to pinpoint and acknowledge specific moments. I was thinking things up at the end of the evening to write down. I wasn’t making it as meaningful and life changing as it could have been. So, to increase my connection with gratitude, as I travel through my day, I look for five things. I am actively noticing things I am grateful for and my awareness of the goodness of people and circumstances surrounding my life has increased. I am being more present and aware as I go through my day and not just stuck in the hamster wheel of my own brain and I have decreased the amount that I look at my phone.

Then, one day the game took an unexpected turn. A stranger did a very small kind act for me and I said aloud, “you’re my number 2 today”. She gave me a strange look with a smile and then asked, “What’s a number 2”? I told her about my gratitude game and how her act of kindness had touched me. She was touched by the fact that her small act would make my list and that something she did had impacted my life. Then she said I was her official number one because she was going to start playing the game as well. Just like that we had made each other’s day a little brighter, our minds a little clearer, and reduced our stress levels. All this done with a small act of kindness and recognition of that kindness.

Introducing the Gratitude Concept

After playing the gratitude game for a while, and my encounter with my number 2 lady, I decided to introduce the concept to my family. My children are 11, 8, and 5. Instead of 5 gratitudes, which I thought may complicate the game in the beginning, I just asked them to notice 3 in their day and then let them know we would share what had made our lists as we went about our day either at dinner as a family.

Two kiddos jumped right on board. One grumbled, but all did it. Five minutes before dinner, I presented them with new notebooks, glittery pencils, and a box of crayons. I asked them to take a moment to write or draw the three things they were grateful for in their new notebooks while I finished getting dinner on the table. The 5-year-old, watching her brother and sister write said, “I can’t write that,” and I told her to draw a picture of each thing and then if she could, sound out and label with the beginning letters of her thoughts.

Building Perspective

I didn’t help them, I fiddled around in the kitchen until everyone looked ready, then we sat down, ate dinner and I asked them to share one (or more if they wanted) thing they had noticed. I also shared my own. And here is where the magic happens…listening to your kids notice things they are grateful for throughout the day from their perspective is amazing as a parent and sparked ideas and conversations, connections, listening and being present among each other that I was not expecting.

They all shared the day together however, each one had different thankful moments that were unique. The middle kiddo said, “I am grateful for our next door neighbors (who are awesome) because they let us go pick raspberries whenever we want and they don’t care how many we eat.” to which the oldest responded, “Oh yeah, that’s a good one, I didn’t think of that one!”

I also noticed is that they started doing the same thing I had done with the kind act lady and actually began to name them aloud as they went through their day. I overheard the middle say to the oldest, “Thanks for letting me borrow that book, that’s my number 3 thing I am grateful for today.” Or when the middle held the door for the youngest, I heard “Thanks, that’s my number 2”. Just like the lady I encountered, you can see on the face of the person who had done the kindness that invoked the gratitude statement that the acknowledgement of their kindness, even though that was not the intention of the act, brings about inner joy and contentment for knowing that they positively impacted another person’s day.

Bringing the Focus onto Others

As anyone who has children has encountered, having them focus their intention on doing something for others instead of demanding things for themselves helps the entire family function at a level of giving and helping rather than expecting and receiving and generally makes life more enjoyable for the household.

I have found that the more my husband and I model the behavior, by making sure to mention out loud when we notice our grateful moments and by taking a moment to stop, and identify verbally with descriptive language (not just, good job kiddo!) these kind and grateful moments our children are choosing, we all have grown in our grateful attitudes and increased peace and joy in our household.

The wonderful thing is that most children gravitate towards this concept very easily as it seems to just be part of our human nature and if sparked and encouraged blooms naturally.

SOURCES:
Greater Good Magazine
Huffington Post
American Psychological Association

erin sadlerJanuary 3, 2018